One reason that so many people claim to value protecting trans women, but won’t go to bat when it comes time to follow through, is that they’re actually only interested in protecting hypothetical, innocent trans women. What these people fail to acknowledge is that, by definition, innocent trans women do not exist. Under patriarchy, “trans woman” and “innocent” are opposing concepts - we are defined as wellsprings of male violence even though, and because, we are some of its primary targets. Trans womanhood is a kind of alchemy that transforms violence committed against us into violence committed by us.
Nine year old trans girls forced to use men’s restrooms at school, homeless trans women forced to stay in men’s housing at shelters, activist trans women driven from “queer” or “women’s” community spaces, incarcerated trans women in men’s lockup or solitary, that isolated trans woman in your area who you’ve heard of but avoid because you’ve heard rumors that she’s “fucked up,” “predatory,” or “crazy” - these articulations of transmisogyny share in common a (partial) basis of defining trans women and our bodies as inherently violent, effectively displacing the blame for male violence onto its victims. This has two consequences. First, by defining trans women as perpetrators of male violence, it also defines us as worthy targets for it. Second, the actual perpetrators and beneficiaries of male violence, men (in this case, especially trans men), are freed from scrutiny (as an aside, this is part of how there are so many aggressively heterosexual TWEFs - you know who you are, lol).
To be a trans woman is to be called rapist as you are raped, batterer as you are beaten, and abuser as you are abused. It is the paradox of being utterly destroyed by the very violence that you are said to embody.
hey this is important i saw a photo of laura dern wearing like a brown leather carhartt jacket and i need to find it again send it to me if you see it
The more that defending me becomes conflated with defending lesbian separatism, the more ground that we will lose on both fronts. Defending me suffers because the conflation leaves Cat’s former crew* free to rail-switch at will to mocking lesbian theory instead of engaging with the facts that [a] their claim that I raped Elle is false and easily countered by facts, and [b] their claim that harassing me over the last several weeks has ever had anything to do with “Protecting The Community” is false and easily countered by facts. I have addressed both of these points in a post that not a single one of them have touched (linked above), and in the account of Elle’s abuse that I wrote months before any of these randos took an interest in dragging me through the mud.
Rather than trying to win an ideological argument with bisexual women and AFAB nonbinary people about what they are entitled to take from us, please do me a favor and just focus on the simple task of shutting down those two specific claims — anything else gives Cat’s former crew the opportunity to generate and engage in the absurdist flame war theatrics which are their specialty and the bulk of their political praxis. And I’m so, so, so tired of being these losers’ focal point.
*defined here as immolatrix, gaywerewolflady, socialjusticedps, joyceanfartboner, ohnoproblems, maggotmaster, girlkisser2k14, bad-ronald, & anyone I missed
Similarly, defense of lesbian separatism suffers because it leaves Cat’s former crew, when cornered in theoretical arguments, free to rail-switch back from mocking lesbian theory to attacking me as an individual and attacking us as a group. This, of course, is a losing prospect for us. I as an individual woman, and even the so-called “”“baeddel crew”“” (defined as a specific cluster of lesbian separatists), will be perceived as Hysterical Bullies so long as we openly attempt to move towards lives free from the influence of men. In turn, this means that our deployment of lesbian separatist theory & praxis to the end of keeping ourselves and each other safe will be perceived and coded as Hysterical Bullying (this is part of where the bafflement over and mockery of 101-level Marxist concepts like reproductive labor is coming from).
Additionally, these are people who truly don’t understand the concept of working as a community. Their circle is and always has been structured as [a] an internet micro-celebrity or three who is/are [b] surrounded by a dozen or so hangers-on, desperately jockeying for position by calling each other out and making tweet-form comedy posts about the superficialities of class, capital, and Neon Genesis Evangelion. We have nothing to gain from engaging them or winning them over. We have no need to “convert” them (we’re lesbian separatists, not gender evangelists). We have done and continue to do our part — let those among them who are lesbians become disabused and come to us on their own (as they have done in the past).
see what i mean lmfao
- A pro bono attorney pushing her client into having any kind of sex can ever fail to constitute rape.
- Pushing someone into domming/performing knifeplay for you (by giving her the knife, guilting her for not performing at all, guilting her for not performing enough, casually stressing how other people would be able to take it further than she could) can ever fail to constitute rape.
- Pushing anyone into having any kind of sex with you can ever fail to constitute rape.
- A butch and/or domme cannot be raped in the act of topping.
- Bondage, gags (by all accounts, literally all of them, including theirs, we had a nonverbal safeword that they were physically free to and eventually did utilize), knifeplay, or any other form of sex act preclude the possibility of a butch and/or domme being raped in the act of topping.
Get the fuck out of my face forever, because you are a rape apologist.
immolatrix, gaywerewolflady, socialjusticedps, joyceanfartboner, ohnoproblems, maggotmaster, girlkisser2k14, bad-ronald, & all of their friends all believe the things on this list.
quick recap on my situation. In the past year since my last mental health crisis that put me in the hospital for 40k of bills that did not address any of my issues, i have been denied disability, medical and housing assistance, all social services and affordable care act insurance. Primarily because im trans and broke and unemployable (a big chunk of my PTSD is from workplace issues, i havent worked fulltime in 5yrs and lost my good freelance jobs when i socially transitioned) on top of that the bipolar meds im on sap my energy and exacerbate my chronic pain issues but no doctor listens or does anything different. Im Stuck i cant live like this i need support so I can get out. Go somewhere else where it sucks less, where i won’t be told No for everything I need over and over again. My community is all broke too and my natal family washed their hands of my problems long ago. I dont know how im gonna pay rent and bills much less get ahead enough to save for the surgical work i need to address the mutilations they performed on my baby intersex genitals. If you want to help, please consider donating to my PayPal firstname.lastname@example.org or you can pay what you want for one of my many electronic music albums at submistress.bandcamp.com . If you cannot afford this please at least boost my cry for help. This situation is so messed up and i cant get out of it by myself. Thanks, Alexis
there have been over 100 shares, thank you! but this post has raised only 5 dollars. my last post, with over 400 shares, raised enough money to ensure i could eat and pay my phone bill. i Need your help. without it I will be forced to do something ridiculous like pretending to be a trans guy for survival reasons. Cause boys get their fundraisers met and girls are left out in the cold. Im fuckin shivering here making a little pouty face. How pathetic, I am worthy of your help and assistance! i shouldn’t have to joke about this stuff but it is So hard to watch community support magically appear for Men but never for women, especially non binary intersex trans women. Please. I don’t have Any other resources.
hey yall, im asking for help again. the place im living currently is severely behind on utilities. there is one working person and three disabled people who are unable to work, and the person who does have an income does not have a stable income either. basically he works selling abandoned junk, and its hard money. recently, his work vehicle broke down which means no income. we were informed this weekend that if we didnt pay the electricity and water, they will be turned off today. we have the initial payment covered, but we need about 700 dollars by friday to keep our resources going. we’re working to get whatever we can together, but it wont be enough. im truly sorry to ask this in a time when so many people seem to be struggling, but if you are able to donate anything, please donate here. please add a note that says “for utilities”. prayers, signal boosts, and well wishes are also deeply appreciated. thank you so much. much love.
i have two homeless disabled queer women friends of mine who need help paying for food, medical expenses, and phone minutes. they haven’t been able to get support for quite a while and they really need the help.
if you’re able and willing to, signal boost and/or donate to their paypal, email@example.com or click here.